I Do Not Accept: Body of Wisdom, Flower Moon
I am finding a new strength emerging through my work with grief.
I’m realizing that somewhere within me lies the belief that grieving is weakness, or only leads to collapse. Physiologically, a big movement of grief through the body does actually lead to collapse - the almost uncontrollable dropping down onto all fours as huge waves of energy, sobs, and wails emerge from the diaphragm.
And not that the ability to collapse isn’t a form of strength and courage. It certainly is. As is tenderness.
But there is a new pathway emerging for me which came forward during our last Refuge online practice for grief & joy.
Sometimes we lose someone, and our grief - when we allow and have capacity for it to flow - moves us through acceptance and letting go. A letting go that can actually bring us closer to who we lost, allows them to take their place in the spirit world as our ancestor, and allows us to return to the world of fully living.
But what if sometimes our grief is meant to show us what we do not accept?
What if, as we acquire the capacity, courage, and support to grieve the atrocities occurring around the world (genocides, wars, ecocides, violence against people of color/women/children/trans folks…), we learn to feel and embody more fully our NO.
What if grieving is not the weak/helpless/hopeless image we may have painted somewhere in our minds.
What if grieving is what gives us the strength to acknowledge what has been and is being lost. And what if through that grief we are so awakened in our rage, and so reignited in our joy and love for life and what is still here to protect and heal and grow, that we become willing, empowered, and able to do what it takes, day in and day out, to create a better world.
A garden gradually emerges... working with the land has always been a core way for me to connect my values/grief/sorrow/vision from within myself out into the physical world
If you find yourself feeling torn and overwhelmed between depression/sadness/defeat, rage, and the need to take action, then what I see is a need for all of it. Grief work is a way to meet the depression/sadness/defeat with reverence, illuminate our rage around what we do not accept, and trust that it’s all here for a reason. Maybe it’s here to change us.
"Grief is course correction."
-Malidoma Somé
Grief is here to change us and show us the way back toward life. Not just to feel fully alive, but to embody life-affirming values, and to create and protect a world that supports and centers LIFE (clean water, ecological and cultural diversity, regenerative food systems, land stewardship, babies, children, mothers, families, elders, communities, people).
In early June, I will be facilitating a small group on a grief & joy journey in a container called Earth’s Embrace. If you too feel called to come into deeper relationship with your grief and all the gifts it can bring into your life, and into this collective moment, I invite you to join us.
This is a container in which your unique lessons and the purpose of grief in your life right now will be encouraged to emerge. A place where we will gather the layers of support and practices that create space for grief, and for all the valuable layers that come with it. A container where we will let the wisdom of the Earth and our bodies (also of the Earth) show us the transformations that are possible.
If you’re interested in joining us, you can apply here.
PS. What is alive for you as you read this piece of writing? We are all in a process of collective transformation together. When we listen, work with what is emerging, self-reflect, co-create, speak up, stand up for what we believe in. In the small moments and the big - this is it. Thank you for being here.
I’d also love to get your opinion. Do you feel a need/would you feel drawn to a space that combines grief work with activism? Perhaps an online community space for somatic grief practice followed by making calls to our representatives on issues we feel moved on? I’m finding for myself that setting aside time each week to make calls is bringing much more vitality, empowerment, and agency into my being. Let me know your thoughts!
With Love,
Nicole
Invitations into Offerings
Here are some opportunities for our paths to cross:
Self-Led:
Somatic Journey Toolkit - Me in your pocket for self-paced embodied learning and healing
Group Experiences:
Earth's Embrace: Eco-Somatic Container for Grief & Joy (June-July)
Song of Aliveness: Eco-Somatic Song Retreat (7/26)
Refuge: A Monthly Online Community Practice for Grief & Joy (every 4th Wed)
Sacred Kin: Conflict as Ceremony with Alicia (5/5)
Sacred Kin: Ancestral Remembrance with Nicole (5/19)
1:1 Experiences:
1:1 Somatic Coaching - Rooting in resilience, growing trust, blooming in authentic belonging. This is for folks with a passion to make a difference; folks moving through or emerging from major life transitions such as illness, loss, career change, big life changes; and folks who desire to increase their capacity for connection and hone their relational skills in context with early developmental patterning & in alignment with their values
1:1 Somatic CranioSacral Therapy - Attuned touch for nervous system care, release, & early developmental repair
1:1 Eco-Somatic Retreats - individualized experiences designed to connect you with the healing power of nature, and the embodied wisdom within you
